MARRIED OR NOT… YOU SHOULD READ THIS. PART 2

 Marriage

My wife and I hadn’t had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mommy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don’t tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.

On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn’t looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.

On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me. On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn’t tell Jane about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.

She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily.

Suddenly it hit me… she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.

Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it’s time to carry mom out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.

But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn’t noticed that our life lacked intimacy. I drove to office…. jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind…I walked upstairs. Jane opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Jane, I do not want the divorce anymore.

She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Jane, I said, I won’t divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn’t value the details of our lives, not because we didn’t love each other anymore. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart. Jane seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away. At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I’ll carry you out every morning until death do us apart.

That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I run up stairs, only to find my wife in the bed - dead. My wife had been fighting CANCER for months and I was so busy with Jane to even notice. She knew that she would die soon and she wanted to save me from the whatever negative reaction from our son, in case we push through with the divorce.— At least, in the eyes of our son—- I’m a loving husband….

The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves.

So find time to be your spouse’s friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage!

If you don’t share this, nothing will happen to you.

If you do, you just might save a marriage. Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.”

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Born To Save

Christmas is only a secular holiday for many people. It means time off from work: it consists of parties and presents. Those who see some religious meaning  in Christmas often restrict it to a baby in a manger scene. The two lessons in the study challenge us to look back before the manger to the preexistent Word of God and to look forward from the manger to the life, death, resurrection, and ascension of the Savior of the World.

 The first lesson. "What Child Is This?" includes the familiar story of Jesus birth in Lure 2:4-7, but it also focuses on the less familiar prophecies of Simeon and Anna in verses 27-38. Simeon predicted that a sword would pierce Mary's soul. This shows that the Child born to the virgin Mary was destined to die for the sins of the world.
 The second lesson, "Life in the Son," is based on the prologue to John's Gospel. John 1:1-18 reveals that the birth of Jesus was not the beginning of the Son of God. He is the Word of God who was in the beginning, who was with God, and who is God. What happened at Bethlehem was that the eternal Word became flesh and dwelt on earth during His lifetime.

 Thus when we view the Baby in the manger, we  need to look back to the eternal Word of God who became the God-man when He was born to the virgin Mary. And we need to look beyond the manger to the cross-and even beyond that. The manger is empty. The cross also is empty. The tomb is empty.
 God told Mary and Joseph to name the child Jesus, which means "Savior" (Matthew 1:21). The angel told the shepherds that Jesus was the Savior, Christ the Lord (Luke 2:11). He was truly "Born to Save."


~StudyTheme



Photo Credit: SomeToThinkAbout

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In Sickness and in Health

In Sickness and in Health

(John 9:1-11)

1 As he went along, he say a man blind from birth. 2 His disciples asked him, "Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?"
     3 "Neither this man nor his parents sinned," said Jesus, "but this happened so that the work of God might be displayed in his life. 4 As long as it is day we must do the work of him who sent me. Night as coming, when no one can work. 5 While I am in the world, I am the light of the world."
     6 Having said this, he spit on the ground made some mud with the saliva, and put it on the man's eyes. 7 "God," he told him, "was in the pool of Siloam" (this word means Sent). So the man went and washed and came home seeing.
     8 His neighbors and those who had formerly seen him begging asked, "Isn't this the same man who used to sit and beg?" 9 Some claimed that he was. Others said, "No, he only looks like him." But he himself insisted, "I am the man." 10 "How then were your eyes opened?" they demanded 11 He replied, "The man they call Jesus made some mud and put it on my eyes. He told me to go to Siloam and wash. So I went and washed and then I could see."

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Did you know the Rebecca's Wedding?

Rebecca's Wedding

  When Abraham was young, He left his home at Ur in Mesopotamia and went to dwell in the land of Canaan. Now that he was old, he knew that the time had come to look for a wife for Isaac, hid son.

   "I wish my boy to marry a girl of our own people," Abraham told his chief servant. "God again to Ur, the city of my brother Nahor, and the Lord will help you find Isaac's bride."

   Abraham's servant took ten of his master's camels, and set off on the journey to Us. Since he was not sure how to go about his search, he prayed for help.

   "Soon, I shall reach the well at Ur," he thought. "When the young women of the city come to draw water, I will speak to the one who seems the fairest. Perhaps she will offer to draw water not only for me, but for my camels as well. Then, I shall know that she is as good as she is beautiful, and that the Lord has sent her."

   Abraham's servant waited by the well at Ur. Before long, a graceful maiden came tripping by, with a jug on her shoulder. "Please give me a sip of water," he asked. "I'm thirsty, for I have traveled far today."

     "Then, your camels must be thirsty, too," the girl replied with a smile. "Drink, while I draw water for them as as well," 

   The servant was amazed. "Surely my prayer has been answered," he thought

   "Who are you, and who is your father?" the man asked "I am Rebecca, daughter of bethuel, the son off Nahor." 

   "Nahor!" the servant exclaimed. "That was the brother of my master Abraham. Now, take me to your family's home." He gave Rebecca a golden ornament and a pair of bracelets----Isaac's gift for his bride-to-be. Rebecca's Mother and brother were pleased with what they heard of Isaac, and decided that Rebecca might marry him if she were willing.

   "I am willing," Rebecca said.  "Tomorrow, let me go to him."

   Near sunset the next day, Isaac went out to the fields by the roadside. There, he saw the caravan coming. "Who is that young man?" Rebecca asked her guide. "That is Abraham's son," the servant told her.

   Shyly, Rebecca got off her camel and went to meet Isaac. The two were Married, and lived happily together for many years.

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Married or not… you should read this. Part 1

                                                                  Marriage.

“When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I’ve got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.

Suddenly I didn’t know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly. She didn’t seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why?

I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn’t talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Jane. I didn’t love her anymore. I just pitied her!

With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company. She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Jane so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.

The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn’t have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Jane. When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.

In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn’t want anything from me, but needed a month’s notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month’s time and she didn’t want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.

This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day. She requested that every day for the month’s duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.

I told Jane about my wife’s divorce conditions. . She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully.

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